 Maira Holzmann: Therapist and EmpowerMentor serving Winter Park and Orlando, Florida
Growing up, sports and academics were my whole life. Nothing short of being captain and getting straight A's would do. By being "perfect," especially at school, I got approval, belonging and love.
At this point, maintaining my "perfect" reputation took a lot of hard work and seemed like the only option.
I went on to complete my undergrad degree in psychology at the University of Michigan. After graduating, I received a scholarship to attend a thirty day mountaineering course in the Wind River Range of Wyoming. This began my career in the business of empowerment.
I had so radically transformed and gotten clear about the true nature of my inner power that I would spend the next ten years of my life in the outdoor education field as a mountaineering instructor in Colorado, California and South Africa.
My time as an outdoor leadership instructor was simply an expression of my life's passion: supporting others on their journeys to empowerment. After having lived in South Africa for almost two years, I eventually decided to return to school and get my master's degree in Social Work.
Letting go of being perfect
Just before entering graduate school, I completed my first and only Half-Ironman triathlon (a 1.2 mile swim, 56 mile bike ride and 13.1 mile run). Just 2 weeks after this and having not fully recuperated, I climbed the Grand Teton (a 13,775 foot peak) in Wyoming. It was a grueling 20-hour push from base camp to summit then back down and out of the park.
I crossed the finish line of my triathlon in tears because I hadn't lived up to the unrealistic race times I had set up for myself. The day after the Grand Teton, sore and exhausted, I suddenly found that the accomplishments I had worked so hard for, left me feeling empty, drained and not feeling any better about myself than before.
Ugh What a drag! In the quest to hold up my self-esteem with outward achievement, my inner life and sense of personal power shrank.
My perfectionism had morphed into body image obsession, over-working my body and trying to live up to impossible standards. It robbed me of celebrating my accomplishments and enjoying hard earned rest, relaxation and restoration. Moreover, it stole my self-esteem and drained me emotionally.
Rocking My Inner Power
Today, as a mother, wife, entrepreneur and service provider, it is crucial that I continue empowering myself with love, compassion and mindfulness.
Now I listen and respond to my body's need for food, rest, and play. I honor my emotional needs and trust my intuition. I engage in spiritual practices that feed my soul and keep me connected to what is really important. And, I put myself first above the need to prove myself.
Looking back on where I am and where I was, my journey towards empowerment and self-acceptance motivates me to support others in doing the same. Using my voice, defining myself on my own terms, and accepting all of who I am requires commitment and dedication.
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